Why?

Why do I keep thinking about you…?

Every time I look at my phone I go through the pictures exchanged through text message.

Every time I do something, even if it’s just going for a walk, I want to share it with you immediately.

Every time I look at the Cherry Blossoms I remember that first time you grabbed my hand and electricity shot through my entire body.

Every time I eat ice cream I reminisce about when you, my friends and I tried to eat a gallon of ice cream together, which makes me recall the feeling of overwhelming happiness when your knee touched mine under the table, like it was a forbidden please.

Every day I remember how I called you drunk, just so that I could hear your voice, just so that I could spend a single moment with you.

However….

Every time I look at my phone another hour passes since you have answered my message,

Every hour that goes by is me waiting with anticipation deep in my heart, saying you are just busy.

Then I remember how you ditched a date at the last moment to go drinking with friends.

Then I remember how I ran into you and you played it off as no big deal.

Then the image of how you were flirting with that Korean girl right in front of me plays again and again like an infinite loop that will never end.

Then I remember how on that same night I called you I told you how I felt, that I wanted to be so much more then friends that it hurt.

Then I recall the sadness and pain when you kept repeating that you only wanted to go to a motel with me…

The pain was indescribable…

Yet somehow….

I want to forgive you if it means I will get one more day with you.

I will ignore what you said, and with a blind eye continue to live in my fantasy world.

I will feel no pain because my fondness for you triumphs it.

I am willing to like you no matter what, go to the end of the world for you, just to be with you…

Why can’t it be the same for you?

Why can’t you be my knight in shining armor?

Why can’t you be the one who will whisk me off my feet like in the movies?

Why can’t you tell me how you feel???

I will understand even if you say it in Korean!!!!

Why do I feel so much pain in my heart while at the same time so much happiness when I think about you?!

WHY CAN’T I GET YOU OUT OF MY HEAD!!!!!

 

WHY DO I KEEP THINKING ABOUT YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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